Dear God, a prayer for my son

Dear God,

Please save my son...he doesnt believe you like I DO. I know you were caucasion with brown hair and blue eyes, I mean look...I found your picture on the googles. He never went to church like I DID...regardless if transportation was provided to him, he should have found a way, not my problem God.

By the way, did I mention to you that he doesnt believe in YOUR WORD? I mean, after all, you did write it, right?

Anyhooser...please bring him back to church where you live, once a week, in our lives. You know, that place that is constructed by man, of the man, for the man. A place where women do not have a say in religion, well at least only in Christianity.

Thank you for calling King James, probably in PRIVATE because you like that kinda thing, to translate the bible into English, the official language of America! haha, laugh with me God its just a joke :)

Thank you, Im so glad that King James put the important things in the bible, like how women should be kept isolated during their menstration and stay away from church, even though right now I am praying that you will bring my son back to church ALL OF THE TIME, you know how you like sexiest principles and all. Must have been mentioned in the gospel of Judas...oh wait, that book wasnt important...never mind that, God.

Anyway, please help him with these sinful Radical thoughts that man has desecrated your name and bring him back to OUR WORD of blindness force fed into us every sunday, or whenever I can make it since I may be on my period this sunday...whatever...and bring him back to your "living-word"

-Amen....oh wait I forgot to ask...when is your next volume going to be published? Thanks, now Amen